I have been so focused on Austin, the Holidays are just so hard without him! But, I have been making a BIG efford do what he would want, to enjoy my time with the rest of the family.
Which brings me closer to my question.
My parents LOVED birds!! They had all kinds of feeders. I bought Mom a book on birds once, she wore it out and asked for another, I found her another one. Daddy liked the bluebirds the best I think. Mom, it was the hawk. Anywhere we went she would watch the countryside for hawks. If there was one out there she'd find it!!
Driving around trying to do Christmas shopping, or going to doctor appointments, I have noticed so MANY hawks!! But, what brings me my question is..... lately, when I'm driving along, usually crying, over a song or a memory..... suddenly, there it is, a hawk. Sitting so majestically on a tree limb or a fence post. So beautiful!!!
Whenever I see a hawk I always think of my mother. Now, I am wondering, is my mom trying to tell me that Austin is just fine?? Is she showing me the one way she KNOWS I will think of her to let me know that Austin is with his great-grandparents and his parental grandparents, safe, loved, and happy.
You would have to know more about my mothers beliefs to understand why I question whether this is the case or not. She didn't believe you went to Heaven or Hell at death, but at the resurrection when Christ comes back for us. So, by her belief, she couldn't show me a sign of any kind.
But, EVERY time I am out and get sad over my grandson, Austin, all of the sudden from out of no where I will see a hawk. Just the sight brings me such an instant feeling of peace!! I feel a warm "glow" for lack of a better word, deep inside me.
Ah well, right or wrong, true or false. I will believe it IS a sign. I just can't feel any other way with the feeling of peace that comes over me at that time, I don't see how it could be anything else!
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